It's one of those days again.

It's one of those days again... when I look in the mirror, grief-stricken tears rolling on my cheeks, weakened by an hour of weeping and asking myself: "Why?"


Why did I consent to a lifelong commitment with the things I don't have compassion about when it is what all it needs: compassion, caring, service, ....? I knew I'd come to this point from the time I have decided to let my parents decide for my life. I knew back then that someday would come when I blame that day when I gave them my "fine".


"Fine" - fine that I'll do it for them. Fine that I'll spent 6 years of my life, at least, pleasing them and making me feel good for the benefits that someday I'll end up getting. But you know what?


Mom, Dad. I'm tired. I can't satisfy your vision for me anymore. 


The pathway you chose for me just can't lead me back to happiness that I should be having right now. You're not the ones who end up having 2 hours sleep to study. You're not the one being ....




*turns lazy*

Fashion Ambassador :3

I've just read from Tricia's and Domz's sites that they are now officially the ambassadors for Fashion 21, one of the biggest names in the fashion industry taking over the Philippines, and well. What can I say? Of course, I'm jealous T_T

hey!

I had just put up a new site with wordpress, but hosted by Sis Anne of Pinkfab.info. Still updating it and all :) I just need to do so for the mean time. still keeping this blog friends! ;)

Second to the Last Semester :)

gradeslip says, "hi world!"

hahaha

I got my gradeslip today, at around 14:21, claimed with an "I-just-got-out-from-the-laundry" test permit (because my mom dumped my bag on the laundry trying to get it cleaned up --which I eventually did), with at least 5 clinical instructors watching me hand it out to the administrator of the grade slips.

Funnier thing during that moment was , my friend has left his test permit again! :p first was during the signing of clearance/issuance of finals stamp.

I was so disappointed with myself, for not fighting for at least some point higher grade... a Full Scholarship requirement is a grade not lower than 1.75 and an average of not lower than 1.50.

To think of it, a "0.08" point difference from that cutoff would cost me about, say, P22,000. Imagine what I could have done with that money. It's enough to pay for a review center in preparation for the Nursing Licensure Exams! o_o

Sembreak 2010 ~ my last :3

So yesterday, we went up hiking towards the National Arts Center founded on the heart of Mount Makiling, Los Baños, Laguna. :) It was such a sunny-cloudy-turned-drizzly day (if there's such a thing), which made it best for hiking since the humidity balance in the air did not really matter much, in contrast with the temperature and all during the summer.

We were all there: Jec, Haze, Pat, Arn and Moi :) about 2 hours later than the posted time, we were starting our trek to the top. I loved how there were 2 DSLR cameras available for photography *thinking I could be one of the subjects :p and hurrying on our way because last time Arnie and I were about to hike at the same site, closing time just hit the clock. :3

it was a tiring 1.5 hour climb to the top, with ups and downs, as usual. then there were those other spectators of the mountaintop view. If I haven't paid attention, I then should have known that:

- they were on their way upwards while we were starting uphill

- they were those same guys who were about to descent just about when we were on our 750 meter distance away from the scene

totally uncool. 8(

at least we got beautiful photos! XD

thanks kuya pat! ;)

dear blog,

i really want to earn money right now. -.-

I think I was very productive yesterday :)

Yesterday, council mates JR and I had our own jaunt, if you may, in Manila... the thrill of being granted the chance of going out of town, without spending any money from your own pocket during schooldays! How I loved the concept. ;) Watching planes launching and landing gave me excitement, since I have always wanted to be an in-flight nurse, he wanted to be a pilot. Cooooool! ^^,

We were supposed to claim the pre-ordered plaques for the upcoming CAM (College of Allied Medicine) week, keenly searching for the store with the same address as with the given receipt, our only map.

Much to our surprise, the owner was not there, and he was actually already talking to one of the staff. We inquired about our orders, the phone guy requested for one of us and *wait for it* IT WAS NOT YET READY! After all the dusty, smoky traffic we have gotten ourselves into for an hour and a half, the stalking of a student whose school was supposed to be from across the street, the excitement of taking home the gold from the mine, *poof!* it burst my bubble.

So we had no choice left but to take responsibility of having another task: buying swim wear for the pageant's segment of showing off your body and having confidence on it. Of course, it was never a busy job. We wasted time scouting for shops nearby, and people were just directing us somewhere we were not looking for. Funny how we were instructed to find a certain place when it was actually what we skipped before heading somewhere else. XD

This is me, "trying out" the *gulps* one-piece bathing suit the contestants are about to wear, taking a photo for future reference :p We almost thought this moment would not arrive, since we only found the 90's type of bathing suit in the previous stalls we were in. And wow...how I wished I brought money for the trip. Everything on display was what my eyes were craving for. -.-

We were bargaining this violet suit for a lower price, which took a while, and when we finally decided on a price, that's when we knew that there was only 1 piece of the thing...and what? we needed 8 of the same kind!!!! -.-

.........

anyway, we headed back to school after a quick meal at the jeep, on the bus, after sleeping throughout the distance. 3 hours late! and I was assigned reporter for the day. how pathetic. -.-

I love my teacher for still allowing us to take part in her class that day *which was reportedly similar to a school program which began with our classmates singing The Prayer!!! :))))) funeeeh! XD

6 months and counting

A call last week has always been resounding in my mind thinking that I have to do something, well, heartbreaking for the most part. I know that all things shall not be final until every process is complete but who cares? everyone else is expecting to move forward and all.

laaaazy

i can't even remember when was the last time i was here. too lazy to do blogs anymore.. --,